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Watchman Nee called it “The Normal Christian life.”
Hudson Taylor called it “The Exchanged Life.”

“I have been crucified with Christ; it is no longer I who live, but Christ lives in me.”
—Galatians 2:20

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Performance    Shame    Codepencency    Abuse    Identity    Rest


Tired of Trying to Measure Up

—Jeff VanVonderen

This book is written for Christians who live under a deeply ingrained code of written and unwritten expectations and rules that shame them and drain them of spiritual strength. Here are some tell-tale signs: Always struggling spiritually, but never feeling anything but tiredness Always feeling guilty–nothing is ever “good enough.” Rest is impossible–even when it’s needed Performance expectations prove you’ll never “measure up.” The Christian life has ceased to be a joy If those signs match your experience, this book is for you. The author is not trying to get you to behave in a “Christian” manner. If trying hard were the key to the victorious Christian life, you’d probably be in the hall of fame by now, don’t you think? This is a message to help you unmask the lies that keep you on a works – righteousness treadmill, to help you discover the liberation of the gospel of grace in Jesus Christ and the rest that comes through what Christ has done on the cross.

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The Grace of Catastrophe

—Jan Winebrenner

Catastrophes can strike anyone, at anytime. No life is immune. No place is invulnerable. The only difference is what we do with them when they come. Jan Winebrenner writes to encourage women who have been stricken by catastrophe: cling to God for comfort and security. He uses challenges in our lives to conform us to His character. Like nothing else, devastation allows God to reveal Himself to us in unimaginable ways, drawing us into closer, deeper intimacy with Him.

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Shattered Dreams

—Dr. Larry Crabb

“Shattered dreams,” writes Dr. Larry Crabb, “are never random. They are always a piece in a larger puzzle, a chapter in a larger story. The Holy Spirit uses the pain of shattered dreams to help us discover our desire for God, to help us begin dreaming the highest dream.” To help you understand this neglected truth in the deepest and most helpful way, author and counselor Larry Crabb has written a wise, hopeful, honest, and realistic examination of life’s difficulties and tragedies. He wraps insights around the bold story of Naomi in the Bible’s book of Ruth. As Crabb retells and illuminates this sometimes disturbing and often profoundly touching story, we are shown how God stripped Naomi of happiness in order to prepare her for joy. And we gain an unforgettable picture of how God uses shattered dreams to release better dreams and a more fulfilling life for those He loves. Shattered dreams have the power to change our lives for good. Forever.

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Classic Christianity

—Bob George

For every vibrant, fulfilled Christian, there seem to be nine who are “doing all the right things” but still feel bogged down, tied up, or burned out. What’s missing? Like so many Christians, Bob George started his Christian life in love with the Savior only to end up years later disappointed and unfulfilled in his Christian walk. Drawing on his own struggles and years of teaching and counseling experience, Bob cuts right to the heart of the matter to confront the question of why so many Christians start out as enthusiastic believers and end up merely “going through the motions” of the Christian life. In his down-to-earth style, Bob George shows us the way back to authentic Christianity: the kind that Christ had in mind when He set us free. What does it mean to have Christ living in me? How can I experience the joy of the Lord daily? If I’m a new creation, who do I still struggle with sin? Classic Christianity will help every sincere seeker to get back on track in experiencing true abundant living. Life’s too short to miss the real thing!

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Problems, God’s Presence & Prayer

—Michael Wells

Are problems in your life keeping you from enjoying God’s presence? Do you imagine that this is God’s punishment for your past misdeeds? Learn how to look at problems as a means of God’s working in our lives.

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Released from Shame

—Sandra D. Wilson, M.D.

Do you feel

  • that your problem is not what you do but who you are?
  • caught in patterns of destructive relationships?
  • that you never get enough affirmation?
  • afraid you’ll pass bad patterns along to your children?
  • that God probably loves you less than others?

If these questions fit you, you may be experiencing shame. Often shame comes from being raised in a family that has an impaired ability to provide its members with healthy nurturing. As a result, you carry emotional scars into adult life, longing for happiness but feeling unworthy of it.

Sandra Wilson knows much about “shame-based” families–both from personal experience and from her years as a family therapist. Drawing from this background, she teaches you biblical principles that have helped her and many others work through painful issues and learn new, healthier ways to live. In this revised edition, Wilson also includes help for parents who want to break the intergenerational cycle of shame and give their children a “grace-based” foundation for life.

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—John and Stasi Eldredge

Every little girl has dreams of being swept up into a great adventure, of being the beautiful princess. Sadly, when women grow up, they are often swept up into a life filled merely with duty and demands. Many Christian women are tired, struggling under the weight of the pressure to be a “good servant,” a nurturing caregiver, or a capable home manager.

What Wild at Heart did for men, Captivating can do for women. This groundbreaking book shows readers the glorious design of women before the fall, describes how the feminine heart can be restored, and casts a vision for the power, freedom, and beauty of a woman released to be all she was meant to be. By revealing the core desires every woman shares-to be romanced, to play an irreplaceable role in a grand adventure, and to unveil beauty-John and Stasi Eldredge invite women to recover their feminine hearts, created in the image of an intimate and passionate God. Further, they encourage men to discover the secret of a woman’s soul and to delight in the beauty and strength women were created to offer.

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—Bill Thrall, Bruce McNicol, John Lynch

TrueFaced draws a clear distinction between two very different underlying motives Christians sometimes operate under: our determination to please God or to trust Him. This book shows us how to trust Him more.

Explore issues of identity and grace in your relationships with others and with God.

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Healing the Shame that Binds You

—John Bradshaw

This classic book, written 17 years ago but still selling more than 13,000 copies every year, has been completely updated and expanded by the author.

“I used to drink,” writes John Bradshaw,”to solve the problems caused by drinking. The more I drank to relieve my shame-based loneliness and hurt, the more I felt ashamed.”

Shame is the motivator behind our toxic behaviors: the compulsion, co-dependency, addiction and drive to superachieve that breaks down the family and destroys personal lives. This book has helped millions identify their personal shame, understand the underlying reasons for it, address these root causes and release themselves from the shame that binds them to their past failures.

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Escape from Codependent Christianity

—Dr. James B. Richards

Many Christians are painfully codependent, and never get free. A codependent lifestyle is a miserable, fearful life. From never feeling secure, to the need to always be in control, the extremes of codependency fuel the chaos and pain in our lives. In Escape from Codependent Christianity, Dr. James B. Richards examines this common phenomenon in light of the truth of Scripture. Codependency is not complicated. It involves depending upon others for what we have no right to expect from them. Codependents often fall into the trap of living on other people’s approval for their own sense of self-worth. They may depend on others for decisions or happiness. No matter what the needs are, the key to codependency involves trying to get from others what people cannot truly give.

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When Pleasing Others is Hurting You

—Dr. David Hawkins

Christians are called to be servants. But people who forfeit their God-given calling and identity in order to please others move from servanthood to codependency. How can they get back on track? Clinical psychologist David Hawkins offers a Christian perspective on healthy relationships and the pitfalls of being a people pleaser. He answers such important questions as…

  • Where does Christian service end and codependency begin?
  • What emotional needs lead to codependency, and how can those needs be met in healthier ways?
  • How can parents help their children avoid codependent behavior?

Readers will resonate with the real-life illustrations of people who no longer know what they think, want, or feel. Suggestions for redirecting unhealthy relationships empower readers to rediscover their own value and personal contribution.

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When People are Big and God is Small

—Edward T. Welch

Edward Welch offers three basic initial reasons to assess how we fear others, and offers seven steps to over coming this fear.  The three Biblical answers, Welch offers, are: “We fear people because they can expose and humiliate us; we fear people because they can reject, ridicule, or despise us; and we fear people because they can attack, oppress, or threaten us.  These reasons together are how and why we see others big and God as small” (23).

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No Mercy

—Preston Gillham

No Mercy is a sweeping adventure of life, love, trust, and desire—an odyssey asserting that real life is more than meets the eye. Hank Henderson thought he was going on vacation to Montana, but his brother had something else in mind. Hank’s life soon dangles on the precipice of disaster. Disoriented. Injured. His resources depleted, Hank is caught between powerful forces. One is dark, aggressive, and powerful. The other, of questionable integrity, appears Hank’s only option for freedom. From his placid fishing of Malden Creek into a dungeon of double-dealing, Hank crosses swollen rivers, scales blizzard strewn heights, and discovers more than he bargained for in an unlikely ally. His hope dependent upon a hesitant trust, Hank gambles to emerge from No Mercy a transformed person.

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—Jennifer Kennedy Dean

We are created to live in an altar’d state—surrendered, yielded, free. The noun altar is usually understood to be a place of worshipful offering. Something of value is offered up and released on the altar. When we turn the noun altar into a verb—altar our fear, our failure, our possessiveness, our need to control—all those things that hold us captive and keep us from running the race at full throttle are released. Through careful exposition and biblical teaching, celebrated author and prayer expert Jennifer Kennedy Dean guides readers on a 40-day exploration of the Scriptures and what it means to truly live a life dead to flesh and alive to the spirit.

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The Freedom of Self Forgetfulness: The Path to True Christian Joy

—Dr. Timothy Keller

What are the marks of a supernaturally changed heart? This is one of the questions the Apostle Paul addresses as he writes to the church in Corinth. He s not after some superficial outward tinkering, but instead a deep rooted, life altering change that takes place on the inside. In an age where pleasing people, puffing up your ego and building your résumé are seen as the methods to make it , the Apostle Paul calls us to find true rest in blessed self forgetfulness. In this short and punchy book, best selling author Timothy Keller, shows that gospel humility means we can stop connecting every experience, every conversation with ourselves and can thus be free from self condemnation. A truly gospel humble person is not a self hating person or a self loving person, but a self forgetful person. This freedom can be yours…

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How to Stop the Pain

—Dr. James B. Richards

You’ve been wounded, and you just can’t seem to heal. You try to get on with your life, but you just can’t move on. This paradigm–shattering book will free you from the forces that would turn you into a victim. It will lead you step–by–step through a simple process that will free you from the pain of the past and protect you from the pain of the future. Discover the emotional freedom that everyone wants but few experience, free yourself from the need to judge others, and learn the only biblical way to prevent pain!

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The Wounded Heart

—Dan Allender

Sexual abuse not only destroys trust, relationships, and dreams, it also causes grief, stress, and feelings of guilt and shame. This book examines the issues surrounding sexual abuse while looking to God for restoration and peace.

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Beauty for Ashes (Biblical Help for the Sexually Abused)

—John Coblentz

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Beauty for Ashes: Receiving Emotional Healing

—Joyce Meyer

Many people seem to have it all together outwardly, but inside they are a wreck. Their past has broken, crushed, and wounded them inwardly. They can be healed. God has a plan, and Isaiah 61 reveals that the Lord came to heal the brokenhearted. He wants to heal victims of abuse and emotional wounding. Joyce Meyer is a victim of the physical, mental, emotional, and sexual abuse she suffered as a child. Yet today she has a nationwide ministry of emotional healing to others like herself. In Beauty for Ashes she outlines major truths that brought healing in her life and describes how other victims of abuse can also experience God’s healing in their lives. You will learn: *How to Deal with the Emotional Pain of Abuse, *How to Understand Your Responsibility to God for Overcoming Abuse, *Why Victims of Abuse Often Suffer from Other Addictive Behaviors, *How to Grab Hold of God’s Unconditional Love, *The Importance of God’s Timing in Working Through Painful Memories.

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The Emotionally Destructive Relationship: See It, Stopping It, Surviving It

—Leslie Vernick

Leslie Vernick, counselor and social worker, has witnessed the devastating effects of emotional abuse. Many, including many in the church, have not addressed this form of destruction in families and relationships because it is difficult to talk about. With godly guidance and practical experience, Vernick offers an empathetic approach to recognizing an emotionally destructive relationship and addresses the symptoms and the damage with biblical tools. Readers will understand how to:

•Reveal behaviors that are meant to control, punish, and hurt

•Confront and speak truth when the timing is right

•Determine when to keep trying, when to get out

•Get safe and stay safe

•Build an identity in Christ

This practical and thorough resource will help countless individuals, families, and churches view abuse from God’s perspective and understand how vital it is for victims to embrace His freedom from the physical, emotional, spiritual, and generational effects of emotionally destructive relationships.

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The Verbally Abusive Relationship (How to Recognize It and How to Respond)

—Patricia Evans

In this fully expanded and updated third edition of the bestselling classic, you learn why verbal abuse is more widespread than ever, and how you can deal with it. You’ll get more of the answers you need to recognize abuse when it happens, respond to abusers safely and appropriately, and most important, lead a happier, healthier life.

In two all-new chapters, Evans reveals the Outside Stresses driving the rise in verbal abuse – and shows you how you can mitigate the devastating effects on your relationships. She also outlines the Levels of Abuse that characterize this kind of behavior – from subtle, insidious put-downs that can erode your self-esteem to full-out tantrums of name-calling, screaming, and threatening that can escalate into physical abuse.

Drawing from hundreds of real situations suffered by real people just like you, Evans offers strategies, sample scripts, and action plans designed to help you deal with the abuse – and the abuser.

This timely new edition of The Verbally Abusive Relationship puts you on the road to recognizing and responding to verbal abuse, one crucial step at a time!

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The Subtle Power of Spiritual Abuse (Recognizing & Escaping Spiritual Manipulation and False Spiritual Authority)

—David Johnson and Jeff VanVonderen

In a breakthrough book first published in 1991, the authors address the dynamics in churches that can ensnare people in legalism, guilt, and begrudging service, keeping them from the grace and joy of God’s kingdom.Written for both those who feel abused and those who may be causing it, The Subtle Power of Spiritual Abuse shows how people get hooked into abusive systems, the impact of controlling leadership on a congregation, and how the abused believer can find rest and recovery.

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The Rest of the Gospel

—Dan Stone and David Gregory

Having God’s forgiveness is wonderful. Spending eternity with God is great. But for now, where is the abundant life Jesus promised? Why is the Christian life such a struggle? Because getting forgiven is only half of the gospel! The rest of the gospel is not us striving on our own to be “good” Christians, but Christ in us, living His life through us as we rest in Him. Are you at rest . . . making major decisions? overcoming temptation? handling the pressures of life? relating to yourself, others, and God? The Rest of the Gospel presents the good news of God’s full grace—not just forgiving us, but coming to live His life in us. God never meant us to live the Christian life through our own strength and ability. As many have discovered, usually through years of failure, that’s impossible! By joining Himself to those who have trusted in Him, Jesus Christ has already provided another way. He intends to live His supernatural life through us, as we depend fully on Him to do so. Jesus said, “Come to me, all who are weary and weighed down, and I will give you rest.” He promised, “I have come that they might have life, and might have it abundantly.” We invite you to explore and experience the life that only He can give, and only He can live.

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Free at Last

—Tony Evans

This reader says it best: ‘Tony Evans explores the problem of Christians who continue to sin and who do not fully utilize the freedom they have received in Christ. He compares Satan to a plantation owner who knows that legally his slaves have been freed, but who tries to convince them that they’ll never make it in this world without him. He says that sometimes we need to make it to rock bottom before we realize that ‘Christ IS the Rock at the bottom.’ This is a very inspiring and encouraging book, both for those who have not confessed Christ and for those who have been Christians for many years.

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Who I Am in Christ

—Neil Anderson

Have you ever been tempted to doubt God’s love?  Well, He never gives up on you.  Do you spend much of your life trying to earn God’s favor?  What a tragic waste of time—because you already have His love! It is the gift of life, which God freely gives you when you decide to follow Christ.  It comes with no strings attached and lasts for eternity.  Who I Am in Christ includes 36 readings and prayers, each and every one based on scriptural passages that assure you of God’s love and your security and freedom in His kingdom.

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Grace Walk

—Dr. Steve McVey

Grace Walk has helped thousands of believers leave behind the “manic-depressive” Christian walk: either running around trying to perform to be acceptable to God—or thinking they’ve failed Him again and wondering if they’ll ever measure up.

Living the grace walk gets Christians off this religious roller coaster. Using his own journey from legalism into grace, Steve McVey illustrates the foundational, biblical truths of who believers are in Jesus Christ and how they can let Him live His life through them each day.

As they experience their identity in Jesus Christ, Christians will come to know “Amazing Grace” as not just a song but as their true way of life.

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—David C. Needham

David Needham asks “Christian, do you know who you are?” in this remarkable and easy-to-understand rerelease of his book about the Christian’s birthright. He offers fresh insight into the theological problem of Christian identity, biblically based teaching, and a challenge for personal enrichment and further Bible study. Birthright achieves an excellent balance between the theological and the practical. The author’s sincerity and candid writing style are guaranteed to buoy the spirits of readers.

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Lifetime Guarantee

—Bill Gillham

You’ve tried fixing your marriage, your kids, your job. Suddenly the light dawns. It’s not your problems that need to be fixed–it’s your life! The good news is that God doesn’t ask you to live your life for Christ, but to let Him live His life through you.

With humor, candor, and “plain vanilla talk,” author Bill Gillham takes a  new and enlightening look at the concept of your identify in Christ. A Christian who walks in this manner is backed by God’s lifetime guarantee.

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They Found the Secret

—V. Raymond Edmond

The exchanged life.’ Hudson Taylor first used the term to describe what it means to know Christ as our sufficiency in all things. Taylor is but one of the many Christian luminaries who have discovered Christ as the secret to abundant living. John Bunyan, Andrew Murray, Amy Carmichael, Oswald Chambers, Charles Finney-behind the varied lives and personalities of these and other men and women lies a common theme, a pattern that leads from desperation to the abundant life Jesus promised. From their stories, we too can find the path to deeper faith and a more vital relationship with God. In They Found the Secret, Raymond Edman presents the lives of twenty well-known and little-known Christians. ‘The details of their experience of the crisis of the deeper life are delightfully different,’ Edman writes, ‘yet their testimony to the reality of the joy and power of the Spirit-filled life is unanimous . . . It is [the Lord] who satisfies the longing soul. He is the secret of the exchanged life!’

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Inside Out

—Larry Crabb

You don’t have to pretend you’ve got it all together . . . when you don’t. You don’t have to pretend your best relationship deeply satisfies . . . when it doesn’t. You don’t have to pretend your struggle with sin is a thing of the past . . . when it isn’t. “Only Christians have the capacity to never pretend,” says Larry Crabb. That’s because real change is only possible when you face the realities of your internal life and let God mold you into a person who is free to be honest, courageous, and loving. If you want a more vital union with God, a richer relationship with others, and a deeper sense of personal wholeness, let Larry  Crabb help you look inside yourself. And discover how God works real, liberating change when you live from the inside out.

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The Marvelous Exchange

—Dick Flatten (out of print — try to find!)

Discover the power of spiritual unions with Christ as Dick Flatten examines Romans 6:1-14.  This book will help all Christians, especially those who have been believers for many years and have felt demoralized by their continual failings to follow God’s desires for their liv lives.  As Christians begin to discover, through Dick’s words, that they really can be ‘emancipated from the power of indwelling sin,’ they will find a peace in their lives that they have never had.


Fully Alive

—Larry Crabb

What makes a man masculine? A woman feminine? Did God design the two genders so differently? If so, why? The answers to these questions will free women and men to gladly embrace all that it means to be fully alive as gendered bearers of God’s image who can profoundly impact others for good by the way they relate.

Author and psychologist Dr. Larry Crabb presents a biblically grounded understanding of gender uniqueness. His illustration of a bridge of connection shows how the two genders can relationally come together in God-revealing harmony as they celebrate their God-designed uniqueness. Readers will discover that God created male and female to relate in gender-specific ways to make a difference in others by displaying God’s relational character. Crabb clearly shows men and women what it means to live fully alive as feminine women and masculine men.

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